Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Life. .Reflection

I knew this trip was coming up and I wouldn't be going with a team of people but with a new mission and purpose. All alone to share my testimony. I chose not to announce it, post where I was, or Go Live (on Facebook) No one knew but my Mother and a select few.

My Mother seems to always come up with the coolest ideas. I know a lot people who carry around precious items from their loved ones who have passed away. It's a way of keeping their spirit close. I wanted to carry things from the women in my family because without them, I wouldn't be who I am. 
I think about how hard they worked, all the sacrifices they made, and I wanted to just feel them with me so that I knew I wasn't alone. My mother came up with pinning the rings of my grandmother and both my great grandmothers to the inside of my dress. 

My "Ugly Cry " moment came when I walked up to President Obama and he said to me "If you are what everyone in Chattanooga is like, then it must be an awesome city". That meant a lot because there are many of us who struggle each day to do our part, stay in our own lane, and its ALL for the betterment and LOVE  for our respective city/state. Sometimes it's received with positivity and sometimes it's not. No matter what, it's moments like this that make all you do from your heart worth it. One thing that will always be known is that I was born and made in Chattanooga, TN. That will never change.

I told my mother I immediately started to cry. It shook me to my core. I remember sitting across from my great grandmother at her dinning room table as she glanced at the cover of Essence. 

(I found the magazine in her bedroom after she died and now I have it at home with me)

She was so overjoyed to see not only a man of African descent as president but the fact that it was a mere possibility that became a reality. She said "Look at them Tina. I never would have imagined".

Today is my last day of being 32. It has been a year of heartache, getting over my fears, having my life flash before my eyes, accepting every part of me for me, and preparing for the next phase. I have been tested in EVERY way imaginable and a lot of the time I thought that I wouldn't make it through. Life can be truly overwhelming at times. September has come with more challenges (I feel like I've been crying the whole month) and life changes but we all must look back and apply the knowledge we have gained to move forward. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined that I would be where I am today. What I wanted to do/have in life is the total opposite of what God chose to do with me. I still have a long way to go in areas of my life too. More Goals. More dreams. More knowledge to obtain. More work on me to be a better person/mother/daughter/wife/friend/family member/world changer. We will all continue to be "works in progress" until our time on this earth is done.

I leave you with this. .
Take life one day at a time. 
Treat and accept people for who they are with love and respect. 
Appreciate your family/friends/tribe who always love, support, have your best interest, and most importantly have your back no matter what. 
Be the best YOU each and every single day. 
Love yourself.
Help your fellow brother/sister in the best way that you can. 
Live and know that your life isn't in vain. Be a light and rock to the children in your life or the ones you come in contact with because they need us in every way for their dreams to become a reality. 
Be proud of all that you overcome and accomplish. 
Have Faith. 
Trust God. 
Never stop believing.Lorean~*
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