Friday, January 24, 2014

Thoughts and Adventures of Cocoa Brown

Who is "Cocoa Brown"? Many seem to think they know her.

Many seem to think that they are friends with her, have loved her, and well her family. .they along with everyone else have no clue.

The "Thoughts and Adventures" of this beautiful BROWN woman will come from experiences with friends, family, business dealings, life, and of course LOVE.

Sometimes short thoughts. .
Sometimes long stories. .so you too can walk through the experience

Poised and always Sophisticated is the Lady by day. .but no matter what "Cocoa Brown" is always around. .

And here we go. .

Reflections on "The Man". .

"There is something about this man. .I don't have to see him with my eyes to know that he is near. .in my presence. It's like an electric surge that travels from the ends of the hair on my head all the way down to the tips of my french manicured toes. I immediately sit up straight or stand taller. My head is a little higher. I don't have to hear his voice to know that he is already speaking to me. The nonverbal. .speaking with only his mind. .to me. .only me. .that's deep. Now this feeling isn't one sided. See. .this man. .he feels it too. He knows that I am WOman. He isn't afraid. He doesn't run. .or deny what is evident". .~*

to be continued. .


Sistahs Chat 3

Annnnnnd I am back!!

Back with another AWEsome panel of women featuring. .
Sabrina Hagood Co-Owner/CFO of 2 Diva's Jewelry
Natalie Newbill Miss Black Tennessee USA 2012/Motivational Speaker
Marquita Ector Blogger of "Edwina Lashan"/Stylist
DaNietra Hall Owner DHall Events/Blogger "The Fairy Glam Mother"
April Johnson Lifestlye Blogger

And Special Guest. .
Stephan Labossiere
Life & Relationship Expert/ Author "God Where Is My Boaz"

Katha D. Blackwell, MSW
Social Worker/ Author "Not Another Victim"

This will not be a chat you want to miss. We will discuss life, love, and the dynamics of healthy relationships. For girls, women, boys, and men. So Brothas. .Please do not exclude yourself from this event because we talk about everything that relates to you all too.

Also DO NOT forget to purchase both of the Author's books!!
"God Where Is My Boaz"

"Not Another Victim"

Following the event meet and greet the Panelist and Special Guest.

Hope to see you there!!

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Being Single: 5 Reasons it may be BEST

So many of us have started out the New Year Single. . and to be honest some of us have started out several New Year's in a row this way. It has it's up and downs but at the end of the day it is for the best. .at this particular time. You can get to know yourself better, love yourself better, and go at your journey towards greatness. This is an article I read last year from Stephan Labossiere author of "God Where is My Boaz?" and felt the need to repost it here for us read and marinate on ;")

Written by: Stephan Labossiere

There is nothing wrong with being single! Too many people have made being single the equivalent to having a disease that needs to be cured right away. People will immediately assume something must be wrong with you and to be honest there likely is something that needs to be addressed within you. Not because you’re single, but because you are a human being, and we all have issues. Some will overlook these issues and jump into a relationship anyway. Only to have it all bite them in the ass later on and create more issues. The reality is that for a lot of people, being single at the moment would be best. Here are 5 reasons this may be true for you.

1. You Don’t Truly Know Yourself.
How can you really know what’s best for you if you have yet to figure yourself out. How can you expect another person to embrace who you truly are when you are more concerned with showing them who you think they want. Bottom line is you can’t, and you shouldn’t. As individuals we need to be more patient when it comes to trying to be in a relationship.  Being so obsessed with getting somebody can cause many to lose themselves and not take the time to get to know themselves. Maximize your time being single by learning how to love and embrace who you are.

2. You Don’t Know How To Take Care Of Yourself.
Most people want to find someone who compliments their life. They don’t want someone who will drain them and can’t uplift them. Almost everybody likes to have someone who is “capable” of taking care of them in the way that they need. Unfortunately some of you can’t even take care of yourself so you damn sure can’t take care of someone else. Use your time being single to become an individual that can be dependable and knows how to handle your business. Grow to be a persons partner and not a grown child that they have to constantly take care of.

3. You Still Want To Live The Single Life. 
Some people want to look like they’re single, talk like they’re single, and behave like they’re single. Yet they still want to be in a relationship and not be “single”. You can’t have it both ways and you should take some time to get your “single desires” out of your system. Entertaining relationships when you still want to have your fun isn’t fair to that person, and you are just setting yourself up for failure. Until you are truly ready for something serious…just embrace being single.

4. You Are Still “In Love” With Your Ex.
Running into the arms of another to get past an ex is not something I would ever recommend. Many times all you are doing is distracting yourself but the issue has not gone away. Whatever happened in that past relationship needs to be worked through within yourself. Being with another person isn’t usually the best way to achieve that despite what some may think. It isn’t fair to put the new person (rebound) in this position, because before you know it this issue will surface and the drama will begin. You’re better off being single than trying to embrace a love that isn’t true.

5. Being Single Will Help You Address Deeper Issues.
Like I said earlier, we all have some issues. Some of us have deeper issues than others and have never truly addressed them. Whether it be sexual abuse, severe heartbreak, absence of our fathers or mothers, and others. These issues are best addressed while being single, before you go looking to get into another relationship. Whether you realize it or not these things will likely have a negative impact on your life and your relationships if you try to ignore them. Get the assistance you need, and put yourself in a much better position to receive the great things you deserve.

It’s not that it is impossible to work these things out while in a relationship. It just makes it a lot harder, and increases the chances of more damage being done along the way. Being single should be an opportunity to grow and prepare your life for what the future has for you. Some may find fulfillment in remaining single and some may find their fulfillment in getting married one day. Whichever will apply to you will be best achieved when you stop treating being single as a pitfall, and start treating it as an opportunity.

Remember to purchase a copy of "God Where is my Boaz" and email me at to *Sign Up* for SophistiKat Bookclub!!

Follow him on Twitter @StephanSpeaks


Orchid Craze

Before the end of 2013 Pantone let the world know what the chosen color for the year 2014 would be. .and that is Radiant Orchid. I offered up a tip of advice for those looking to rock this beautiful shade but there is more than just 1 of this beautiful color. Finding out which shade is perfect for you is the key. It's not only for the purpose of wearing. .but you will find this color is Gorgeous in shoes, nail color shades, even adding a pop to a room in your home, or decor.

Here are a few FAVs I found online to share. .

The "Little Orchid Dress" will be a staple for any Fashionistas wardrobe for this Spring/Summer. This particular style is a twist on the "LBD" and can be paired for the office with the perfect Cardigan and Scarf. My night the Cardigan and Scarf can be removed and replace with a beautiful collar statement necklace, bracelet, and earrings.

Nothing says sophistication like a classic Manolo Blahnik. (I have a Black leather pair similar to this and they have never gone out of style.)
This sleek suede pump in a more vibrant shade of orchid but a must have for this upcoming year.

Hoopla "Diagnose Me", Butter London "Molly Coddled", and OPI "I'm Feeling Sashy"

Starting out the New Year right we look for new things to give us that spunk. .a lot of times it can be a change of nail color to give us just that. 3 of the top Nail Lacques lines have delivered just that.

Feeling the need to add a little spice and change up a few things in your living space? For my ladies this is the perfect time to tap into what your outlook is for this New Year, how you want to jazz up your "quiet place" in your home, or just simply change some things to let your personality shine. I loved this photo because it incorporates several of my favorite shades but what does it for me is the bright orchid walls and white trimming. Such soothing yet invigorating colors.

This was just a few more ways on how to add this gorgeous color into your life this year.


Thursday, January 2, 2014

Boots are made for Stylin~*

Here is another great article on Boots!! Fall and Winter are the perfect time of year for you to let bring out your flyest sweaters and rock your baddest or most comfy boots. Also check me out rocking the classic Frye boots (I was cracking up in this photo!! So much FUN)~*

Written by: Karen Nazor Hill
For: Chattanooga Times Free Press January 2, 2014

So you thought UGG boots were a passing thing, huh?


Gaye Maxwell, manager of the shoe department at Dillard's, says UGG still is its No. 1-selling boot, followed closely by Frye boots. Both brands are "flying out of the store," Maxwell says.

The popularity of the boots, particularly UGG, surprises Dillard's manager Bill Graves.

"I thought they'd last a few seasons, but it gets bigger every year," he says. "In fact, the popularity of boots across the board is amazing. I see them on everybody -- even babies."

The UGG sheepskin boot has been around since the late 1970s and, because of its warmth, became popular among surfers on the West Coast. By the late 1990s, celebrities began wearing UGGs and, after being featured by Oprah on "Oprah's Favorite Things" show in 2000, they skyrocketed to fame.

The popularity of boots doesn't surprise Victoria Underwood of Dayton, Tenn. She owns 15 pairs and is always on the hunt for more.

Underwood, 32, owner of the Insyde Outsyde Shop in Red Bank, says she wears boots most every day, except in summer. She's partial to flat-heel boots because of the comfort.

"I wear them with jeans, dresses and skirts," Underwood says. "My favorite pair is an $80 pair of Jessica Simpson boots that have lasted about four years, but I'll probably replace them with some from Frye, though my husband isn't a fan of the price tag. I also love my red Hunter Wellies from Neiman Marcus because they are really stylish and keep my feet dry."

Frye boots range in cost from around $300 to $370, Maxwell says. UGG boots are less costly, between $150 and $300.

"You get what you pay for because these boots last for years," Underwood says, noting that she has a pair of Frye boots that she's been wearing for nearly 20 years. "They have molded to the shape of my feet and are the most comfortable shoes I have."

Maxwell says that, like the UGG brand, Frye boot sales at Dillard's have been on the increase in the last couple years.

"Everyone knows the name 'Frye,' and they know it's a well-made boot from a well-known company," she says. "The company still offers the classic cowboy style to updated looks that include a casual style, a rock'n'roll style, a motorcycle style and more. It's the boot you will wear forever. Dress it up. Dress it down. Fryes are on fire."

Frye has been around for 150 years, according to Founder John A. Frye started the company on March 10, 1863, in a small shop in Marlboro, Mass.

Maxwell credits the increasing popularity of Frye and UGG boots to the updated styles.

"Frye is no longer just the cowboy boot," she says. "It has always been a big seller and still is, but the styles have been revamped and look knew. There are so many different styles now and they're all beautiful. They're also made from quality leather. We get very few returns in Fryes and UGGs."

Underwood says she wears boots with most everything in her wardrobe ranging from leggings to feminine dresses.

"I get ideas from Pinterest because I can search something like 'mint green leggings' and find what what boots look good with it," she says. "I think the only thing I don't wear boots with are shorts and that's only because I don't think that suits me."

Caroline Johnson, 53, is excited about the tall, black dress boots that she's getting from Santa this year.

She specifically asked him for the boots that also have a narrow shaft -- to accommodate her slim calves -- with a medium-sized heel. The boots are perfect for work and church, she says.

Out of the six pairs of boots she owns, Johnson says she wears her brown pair the most, but expects her new black ones to look better with most her clothes.

"I really like the look of tall slim boots with tights and a slim short skirt, but I wear them with long skirts and dresses as well," Johnson says. "For some reason, I tend to avoid wearing boots with slacks -- the one exception being jeans. I think everything works with jeans."

Still, Johnson likes all styles of boots.

"I've got some great cowboy boots, hiking boots, and my favorite are my Land's End fleece-lined rain boots. I just adore them," she says. "They are my footwear of choice this time of year whenever I walk my dog, and we go on long hikes at Greenway Farm and along the South Chickamauga Greenway."

Johnson says she wears mostly boots in cooler weather and sandals when it gets warm.

Maxwell says it's not just the gals wearing boots. Men like them, too, even the UGG boot. Men, locally, tend to favor UGG sheepskin driving moccasins, she says, but Fryes also are extremely popular with men.

"Men like quality and comfort, too."


Wednesday, January 1, 2014

SophistiKat Book Club is BACK!!

Hey Everybody!! Pearls, Books, and Tea is BACK!!

I have had the book club for over a year now and have had some great meetings with SophistiKats who love to read just as much as I do. Now I received a few emails from Brothas who would like to be apart of the book club as well but couldn't get past the "Pearls". LoL!! I understand and I don't want to exclude you all. So I want ALL the Brothas to know that they are welcome to join, come out and chat. Hey. .Bring your Bow-tie ;")

As women single, in a relationship, or married we can all use some advice. How to approach dating from a Christian standpoint, how to keep the sparks flying after we are committed, and also insight into the mind of men so that we can understand them better while learning how to convey our needs for understanding as well. I posted tips for my Single SophistiKats (from to start the year off and in conjunction with those tips I felt this would be the perfect read on the journey to finding ourselves and the right mate. Plus I love introducing my FAVorite authors to other avid readers who may not be familiar with their works.

“GOD Where is My Boaz” is a woman’s guide to understanding what is hindering her from receiving the love and relationship she truly deserves. A practical and spiritual approach to the issues a lot of women are facing. A straight forward and easy to read book that will help you:

  • Recognize and overcome the obstacles in love & relationships 
  • Take steps towards truly becoming the blessing you hope to receive 
  • Feel empowered, encouraged, and focused on progress

"God Where is My Boaz?" is the latest book from Author, Life and Relationship Coach, and Professional Speaker Stephan Labossiere.

A little about the Author. .

Stephan is a certified relationship coach, a speaker and author, Stephan seizes every opportunity to help both men and women overcome the challenges that hinder their relationships. From understanding the opposite sex, to navigating the paths and avoiding the pitfalls of relationships and self growth, Stephan’s relationship advice and insight helps countless individuals achieve an authentically amazing life.

Stephan empowers millions to take charge of the difficult situations standing in the way of the life and love they seek and to make impactful changes on a daily basis.

Dedicated to helping, and devoted to keeping it real, Stephan’s straightforward, yet compassionate delivery style, attracts a versatile clientele including; notable celebrities, civic and social organizations, academic institutions, singles, and couples alike, who can and are ready to handle the truth!

Seen, heard and chronicled in national and international media outlets including; the Tom Joyner Morning Show, The Examiner, ABC, and Huffington Post Live, to name a few. Stephan is highly sought-after because he is able to dispel the myths of relationship breakdowns and obstacles–platonic, romantic, and otherwise—with fervor and finesse. To coin a phrase by an individual who attended one of his speaking engagements, “he’s definitely the relationship guy, all relationships all the time.”

I  have read some of the book so far and I must say that it indeed is a MUST HAVE and MUST READ. I know that once I complete it, I will indeed re-read it to prepare for the event.

Sistah's Chat 3 will take place February 22, 2013 where will discuss the book. Be on the look out for the flyer and details for the event.

Get started by purchasing "God Where is my Boaz?" on PDF or Kindle version $4.99,
MP3 Audio $6.99, or Paperback $14.99 (hardcopy) at this link

Also for more information on Stephan check out his website
Follow him on Twitter @StephanSpeaks
"Like" him on Facebook

I hope you all are just as excited as I am!!


2013 was a wonderful year with many blessings for each of us. Let us start this year with a renewed spirit and faith that our walk with God is not yet done here on earth and allow him to use us for the betterment of this world. I don't know about you but I had to praise his name and give him Thanks for ALL that he has not only done for me but all of my friends and loved ones. I watched so many people flourish and step into their divine purpose last year and it felt great. I am so proud of all of you and have expressed it to each of you throughout the year. All of those who have supported me in my endeavors, believed in what I tried to do, and were just there with encouraging words. .I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I leave you with this quote to start your year:

"Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world."~Harriet Tubman*

Go Get IT!!


Single SophistiKat's Guide to the New Year

It is a New day and a New YEAR!! Some of us are in committed relationships. .some engaged. .some married. .and well some of us are still SINGLE and FABulous. I am in the Single and FAB category and wanted to share a few tips with my ladies on how to operate in this year. Old patterns have to cease and we have to move forward renewed and open for all that life and 2014 has to offer us. One of my FAV writers Charli Penn for has broken it down in the perfect list for us. .Take notes. .Take the Pledge. .and Let's GO!!

Written for
By: Charli Penn

I Will Not Apologize for My Success
You’ve worked very hard for all the accomplishments and success in your life and any man worth your time will recognize that it’s something to be proud of, not apologetic for. If he expects you to be less of a woman, he’s obviously less of a man. Red flag alert.

I Will Not Respond If He Texts Instead of Calls
Let’s face it, you don’t text the ones you love, you call them. If he can’t take five minutes for you, why even give him five seconds?

I Will Not Stop Living My Life
Hiding out in the house on Friday nights — aka date night — is officially out of the question. When your girls call, you will answer and make it a point to go out and enjoy the perks of single life, rather than obsess about the downers.

I Will Not Wait for His Phone Call
Maybe he’ll call. Maybe he won’t. It doesn’t matter, because you won’t be obsessively checking your phone to find out. Tuck that iPhone in your bag and get on with your day. He can always leave a message.

I Won't Make Excuses for Him
“He was going to but he…” “He meant well but…” “He said he’ll make it up to me because…” Sound familiar? If you have to start a sentence with any of the aforementioned phrases, you’re in trouble. Ban them from your vocabulary in the New Year.

I Will Date With a Purpose
If you’re not interested, don’t waste his time, or yours. It’s as simple as that. No one benefits from going on a date with someone who really has zero interest in getting to know you better. Use the time to do what you really want to do.

I Will Believe in Love
If you’re not giving up on your career goals, you shouldn’t pass on your plans for love either. A goal is a goal and just like all the other ones you set, at first you must believe.

I Will Recognize a Good Man When I See Him
Did you ever stop to wonder if Mr. Right wasn’t the man standing next to Mr. Right Now the night you approached him at the bar? It’s very possible. This year, be prepared to recognize a good men when you see him.

I Will Not Stay In On Holidays Just Because I'm Single
When it comes to your social life, be proactive, not reactive. Whether you’re the first one to RSVP for this year’s Cupid Sucks party, or the one hosting next year’s New Year’s Eve bash, we’re sure there’s lots of options better than “just staying home.”

I Won't Settle for Less Than I Deserve
Start the year with a renewed sense of self worth and appreciation. The ultimate show of confidence is standing by the goals you’ve set and the choices you make. If he doesn’t fit the bill, believe in your decision to seek what’s best for you moving forward.

I Will Not Call Any Ex from 2013
You know what they say, it’s always wise to leave the past in the past. Remember, you two called it quits for a reason. You can’t move forward if you’re stuck in reverse.

I Will Not Look at Myself As A Third Wheel
Your married friends like to have fun too. Passing on spending time with your close girlfriends just because you don’t share a relationship status with them is just silly. Conventional wisdom says surround yourself with what you want to have in your life — you don’t avoid it.

I Will Look Pretty for Me, Not Him
Book a regular mani-pedi or a spa retreat because you want to look and feel your most fabulous. The only person you should aim to impress is yourself.

I don't know about you but a lot of these things I have already been doing. .time for us to step it up a notch and accept only the BEST!!