Skip to main content

5 Dating Tips from Tionna Smalls

Author of “Girl, Get Your Mind Right” and love coach Tionna Tee Smalls doesn’t beat around the bush — as we witnessed on “What Chilli Wants.” We’ve watched her give the former TLC member dating advice straight, no chaser.

#1 Stop Searching

The first way to find a man is basically to not look for a man. When you’re not searching for something that’s when the thing finds you. You know how the days you go hard in search for a guy are the days that you just don’t meet anyone. You have to go out with the goal of having fun instead. We all have girlfriends who, when they go out, they want to go home if no guy is talking to them. They had a goal to meet a guy. But if he’s not around, you can’t kill yourself.

#2 Shorten The List

“People put standards on other people that they can’t even fulfill themselves. A perfect example is "Chilli’s list". A lot of people will not be able to fulfill that list. All of these requirements will keep you by yourself for a very long time. You have to ‘WWAM,’ meaning you have to ‘Work With A Man.’ We have girls that write me every day that say that their list is longer than Chilli’s and they’re not even super stars. You have to be realistic and you have to ask yourself, ‘How many of these things am I fulfilling?

#3 The Greatest Love of All

A man knows when a woman loves herself, and that love doesn’t come overnight. It’s a special standard for yourself. We have so many friends who just go from man to man and they never get their stuff together because they don’t like themselves. Get into yourself and get yourself together and then a man will come along. When you’ve gotten yourself together, it seems like you just naturally meet a lot of people. So be into yourself. No man wants a woman who doesn’t have her own life.

#4 Keep It Frisky

You have to make him come back for more. If you like him and you just want to freak him out, you’ve got to go all in. We get a little comfortable sometimes. We always feel like we’re in there already when we’re not. No one wants a boring sex partner. A man doesn’t want to be bored and a lot of women don’t know this, but they’re really boring sexually or they’re really selfish. Whatever you’ve got to do, get it done.

#5 Space It Out

“Lastly, give a man some space. Don’t sweat him. Everybody wants a challenge. I always tell women having sex too soon is not why a man loses interest. A man loses interest when a woman gets clingy. Space is important. Don’t call him all the time. Let him call you. My mother says, “You know when a man likes you if he calls you.” It goes both ways. You need some space too."

Tionna Smalls is the smart, quick-witted, brutally honest voice behind’s former advice column “Ask Tionna” and the book “Girl Get Your Mind Right: The Tell-It-Like-It-Is Advice Your Love Life Has Been Missing.” She has been seen giving recording artist Chilli relationships advice on VH1’s hit reality TV show “What Chilli Wants.” 


  1. Jamie is the premier Los Angeles dating coach giving dating advice for guys even tips for shy guys, offering relationship advice - also in the San Diego area.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Today In Black

Rachel Boone was a slave of the decendents of the Daniel Boone family who escaped to an army camp near Miami, MO. She gave birth to a son & moved to Warrensburg, MO. Her son became "Blind" Boone, famous classical pianist known all over the U.S., Canada & Mexico who also reportedly played in Europe. He became known as the "pioneer of ragtime" because he brought in ragtime music to the concert stage as an encore or when the audience became restless, saying "Let's put the cookies on the bottom shelf where everybody can reach them.". His motto was "Merit, not sympathy, wins."

The first Kentucky Derby is won by African American jockey Oliver Lewis riding the horse Aristides. 14 of the 15 jockeys in the race are African Americans.

1909* White firemen on Georgia Railroad struck to protest employment of Blacks.

National Baptist Convention chartered.

U.S. Supreme Court in landmark Brown v. Board of Education decision declared s…

9 Types of Sex Every Woman SHOULD Have

There are a million different ways to twist the sheets. Just check the Kama Sutra, but no one can try them all. That said, there are a few types of sex every woman should experience at least once. Ladies, LISTEN UP, because if you haven’t done the deed these nine ways, you’re totally missing out!!

I’m Sorry Sex*
Otherwise known as make up sex. It’s what happens when that thin line between anger and passion is crossed and the result is most often spontaneous and mind blowing.

Vacation Sex*
It’s not for everyone, but we’re here to tell you, sex in paradise with a gorgeous man you just met can often be the most thrilling kind. (As long as it’s safe sex, of course.) He’s mysterious and gorgeous and he makes you feel sexy – a recipe for vacation bliss.

We Might Get Caught Sex*
You know that moment when the sparks are flying between you but you just can’t sneak away. Toss those inhibitions and do it anyway. Go find your own little corner of heaven and steal a moment all your own. Sure, you might …

Women's History Month Spotlight: Harriet Tubman

In Honor of Women's History Month  we will provide you with information on Outstanding women and organizations whom have made an impact not only in  African American history. .but most of all the World.
Today we highlight and pay our Respects to the Life and Legacy of Harriet Tubman!! 

Harriet Tubman is perhaps the most well-known of all the Underground Railroad's "conductors." During a ten-year span she made 19 trips into the South and escorted over 300 slaves to freedom. And, as she once proudly pointed out to Frederick Douglass, in all of her journeys she  "never lost a single passenger."

Tubman was born a slave in Maryland's Dorchester County around 1820. At age five or six, she began to work as a house servant. Seven years later she was sent to work in the fields. While she was still in her early teens, she suffered an injury that would follow her for the rest of her life. Always ready to stand up for someone else, Tubman blocked a doorway to protect ano…